Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Killing your darlings means taking out what doesn't work from a story, even if you love it.

This one landed here for a final breath.

As the day's heat lessens, birds cry out calls of ownership, love and need, all mingling together into a clamor of I’m hereRight hereStay awayHelloHelloFind meLove meWe’re starvingFeed usHurryMomMineHelloStay awayHurryHello!  Hello!”
Indigo Buntings scissor the air with high pitched song.  Blue Jays arrow from branch to branch, announcing their flight, more important than anyone else.  Crows gang up on bigger birds.  Want to fightCome on, come on, want to fight?  Sparrows, the white trash of the bird kingdom, serenade more sweetly than expected.  Mourning Doves pretend to be owls in the distance.  Chipmunks (not birds, but want to be their friends even though they are often ignored because they are like the boy who cried wolf) make an annoying sound like a nail being hammered into tin, over and over and over again.  Cardinals only speak to each, so much in-love that they must stay in constant contact.  Hawks, high above, whistle like a tea kettle in the heavens.  And robins sunbathe, waiting for a moment of silence before bursting into full fledged song, putting the rest to shame. 
Then by nine or so, they begin to quiet, and the world belongs to louder voices coming from inside houses built too near each other, the narrow alleys encasing the echoes, holding on to them until morning when they finally drift upwards with the fog, leaving pressure on eyes, aches in throats, and dreams in tender hearts of a sweeter song, somewhere, sometime, long ago.  


Rae said...

I've been struggling with that. But glad to see your darling here, especially the way that it ends.

sarah willis said...

Thanks, Rae!